Ever Considered the Adoption Option?

Ever Considered The Adoption Option?
John R. Petrilli

At Christmas time we often revisit the nativity narrative with a kind of familiarity that virtually blinds us to the sublime beauty revealed in the oft-overlooked details hidden between the lines. All too mindful of the broad sweep of the story, we often miss some of the interesting and helpful nuances that this story contains. Contemporary issues like an unwed teen pregnancy come into bold relief as we wrestle with Mary’ awkward predicament. Then there’s Joseph’s challenge to serve as God’s handpicked man to function as Jesus’ adoptive parent. Now there’s a modern issue … adoption.

I attended a Steven Curtis Chapman concert last year. The gifted pop-Christian artist devoted much of the evening to the issue of adoption. Chapman used video clips of his own adoptive daughter, Shaohannah, as well as a moving personal testimony to get across the great need that exists to adopt children. An estimated one million children in the United States live with adoptive parents. The most recent statistics for all 50 states indicate that 127,441 children were adopted in the U.S. in 1992. Millions more children worldwide await being adopted into a loving home they can genuinely call their own.

There are six different types of adoption, including Public adoption (children in child welfare system are placed in homes), Private adoptions (children are placed in homes by a non-profit or for-profit agency), Kinship adoptions (children are placed in relatives’ homes), Stepparent adoptions (children are adopted by spouse of one birth parent), Trans-racial adoptions (children are placed with an adoptive family of another race), and Inter-country/International adoptions (children who are citizens of a foreign nation are adopted by U.S. families and brought to the United States).

Hundreds of Christian and non-Christian agencies across the nation specialize in matching orphaned children to eager parents. I personally know a late 40’s something couple that’s in the process of adopting their first child. Another pair sacrificed the family business to insure that their adoptive daughter from Eastern Europe didn’t end up on the streets of a town in the country of Latvia.

These steps of intense and heroic proportions can only be attributed to one thing. Simple, unsophisticated, sacrificial love. Love was the only thing that caused the heart of Pharoah’s daughter to rescue and raise Moses as her adopted child, even though she knew full well he was a Hebrew baby (Exodus 2:10). When his cousin Hadassah’s parents died, Mordecai’s love for his relative drove him to adopt her as his own (Esther 2:7). This is the very same love that God put into the heart of Christmas’s first adoptive parent. Consider these observations on adoptive parenting from the testimony of Joseph’s life.


ADOPTIVE PARENTHOOD IS BEST DONE WHEN IT’S A CHOICE, NOT AN OBLIGATION.

Joseph, by most calculations, was only a teenager himself. By Jewish law he could have released himself from all responsibility for this baby to be birthed by his fiancé. No one could scarcely blame him if he had washed his hands could they? He was in no way responsible for any part of this predicament Mary found herself in. Indeed, common decency may even dictate that he in fact, should quickly distance himself from her via divorce, thereby clearing his good name.

But God had a plan, albeit a most unusual, even unprecedented one. Once Joseph grasped the momentous nature of Mary’s pregnancy everything about the situation changed for him. This was no longer about him. Instead it became something that was all about God’s intention of saving the entire human race through a Man Who would be birthed as Mary’s firstborn. The angel never demanded Joseph’s compliance. He didn’t need to because Joseph’s love for Mary alone was sufficient for him to go the second mile in following through on their wedding plans.

Joseph processed all the input he’d received, and decided to willingly participate in what God was doing, even if it required him to swallow any pride he may have had. Joseph gallantly agreed to stick by his bride-to-be, no matter what the cost. And let’s not kid ourselves by romanticizing the nativity. It cost him a great deal. Never would he be able to claim Jesus as his true flesh and blood son. Never would he be able to recognize his genetic predisposition in his son Jesus. Mary’s perhaps, but not his. No, he would become an adoptive parent by choice, not by force or necessity. Joseph models the kind of love and commitment to the welfare of both birthing mother and birthed child that’s requisite to being an effective adoptive parent.


ADOPTIVE PARENTHOOD MAKES UNEXPECTED AND UNPRECEDENTED DEMANDS UPON ONE’S LIFE.

Getting past the story lines, we discover that it was to Joseph that the job fell of relocating the tiny new family to a distant city by donkey. To Joseph fell the inconvenience of securing adequate shelter for an overnight stay in the already overcrowded town of Bethlehem. To Joseph fell the thankless task of packing up the family’s belonging to execute a predawn cross-country escape into the distant land of Egypt. To Joseph fell the stressful responsibility of finding employment to sustain his wife and adopted son during their extended stay in Egypt. To Joseph fell the responsibility of gearing up for the return trip back to Israel years later. To Joseph fell the responsibility of establishing himself as a carpenter in their chosen hometown of Nazareth. And to faithful Joseph fell the responsibility of overseeing the healthy development of his adopted son into a well-rounded young man (Luke 2:40, 52).

These insights into the adoptive parenting techniques of Joseph reveal the sweeping, ongoing, and ever growing demands placed upon a parent of an adopted child. No amount of time, talent, treasure or energy was spared by Joseph in his admirable efforts to insure that his son had the best upbringing he could possibly provide. Love can do no less. Can an adoptive parent love a child as if they were his or her very own? Everything in the life of Joseph shouts a resounding “Yes!”


ADOPTIVE PARENTHOOD REAPS GREAT REWARDS.

Not only did Jesus’ grow up well, He grew up godly. See Him expressing a prodigously deep level of devotion to the things of God at the early age of twelve. Barely entering puberty, He was already stumping and amazing the learned doctorate holders of His day (Luke 2:46-47). Such grasp of God and His ways didn’t just happen. Although Jesus was God, Scripture clearly indicates that His mental, spiritual and social development were a process (Hebrews 5:8). Doubtless he attended the synagogue school of His day, and we know for certain that he was regular in church attendance (Luke 4:16). These activities during His juvenile and adolescent years surely contributed to His solid grasp of God’s Word (Matthew 4:4,7,10).

Most scholars reasonably conclude that Joseph died sometime before Jesus’ death on the cross, as Christ commends His mother to the care of His closest friend John (John 19:25-27), something that would have been the responsibility of her husband had Joseph been alive at that time. Just how much of Jesus predicted prominence in the life of His contemporaries Joseph may have had the privilege of witnessing with his own eyes we cannot safely ascertain. But we can be sure that every minute of time this surrogate father spent with his son, every prayer he’d prayed for Him, every trick of the carpenter’s trade he’d taught Him, every Bible story he recounted for Him from the Hebrew Scriptures left its telling mark. The result was a Spirit-filled Man who was “mighty in word and deed” (Acts 10:38 ; Luke 24:19). What Joseph may have missed was not lost on Mary. As Jesus co-parent, she watched in awe and pure joy as her Son fulfilled the prophecies spoken about Him at His birth (Luke 2:19). A prouder parent no one could find.

While adoptive parenting has its share of demands, sacrifices, trials and challenges, there is a reward for all who take this selfless mantle and carry it with distinction. Joseph did, and the result was the promise, possibilities, and potential that resulted in a Man through Whom eternal redemption would be obtained for all men. Who knows that the child you have adopted or are considering adopting may become the next Billy Graham or Mother Theresa? God knows, and He simply calls you to parent that child in a way that honors Him and develops that precious life into a person of character and accomplishment.


ADOPTIVE PARENTHOOD BEAUTIFULLY REFLECTS THE TENDER HEART OF GOD, AND HAPPENS TO BE HIS CHOSEN METHOD OF WELCOMING US INTO HIS SPIRITUAL FAMILY.

If we’re ever prone to think that we deserve a position as God’s sons and daughters then we had better rethink such a patently false assumption. The Word reveals that we’ve become children of God because of the gracious act on God’s part to adopt us as His very own children. Nothing we have done, or are, or ever will be can position or qualify us for such a distinctive honor. We’re His children because, and only because, He has chosen to adopt us.

As a Roman custom, adoption was a legal action by which a person took a child into his home who was usually of no kin to him, and entitled the adoptee to all the rights and privileges of a natural-born child. In Paul’s letter to the Galatians, the incarnation of Christ we celebrate at Christmas time is the backdrop against which our adoption is placed (Galatians 4:5-7). The whole purpose in sending the Son into world was that of spiritual adoption into His family through Jesus Christ (Ephesians 1:5). By receiving Jesus Christ, any person on the planet can instantly be adopted into the household of faith (John 1:12 ; Ephesians 2:19). As joint heirs with Jesus Himself, we can enjoy all the privileges of membership in God’s family including possession of the Holy Spirit (Galatians 4:6), communication with the Father in prayer (Romans 8:15), sharing in the Father’s work (Matthew 28:19-20), enjoying the privileged status of being God’s own dearly loved children (1 John 3:2), and inheriting the future glory of reigning with Christ down through the ages of eternity (Romans 8:17).

Adoptive parents can reflect the heart of their heavenly Father by providing the same kind of unconditional love, unfailing support, steady commitment, and rich blessing for their charges. God promises a very unique and special blessing to those who take up this honorable and Christ-like role (James 1:27), for it most closely mirrors the infinitely loving adoptive heart of a God Who describes Himself as “the Father of the fatherless” (Psalm 68:5). George Mueller took God up on this challenge, and successfully founded and maintained numerous orphanages that saved and nurtured thousands of parentless children in Bristol, England in the 1800’s. Not once in multiplied decades did any of his adopted children go hungry! God is faithful, and promises to supply every need that surfaces in the lives of adoptive parent as well as adopted child (Psalm 37:25)!


ACTION STEPS

One really cool way to make a difference in this world one child at a time is the adoption option. Imagine the global revolution that would take place if only a fraction of us adopted. The world would look like a different place! Indeed, the world would become a truly different place! If God is laying it on your heart to adopt, or if you wish to further investigate this vital ministry, a number of options exist. First, in addition to the traditional channels of adoption agencies, there are also some Christian ministries which specialize in providing matching grants and interest-free loans to Christian families that want to adopt. Two such agencies are the Abba Fund and Lifesong For Orphans. In addition, Steven Curtis Chapman, who recently lost adopted daughter Shaohannah in a highly publicized tragic accident, has established Shaohannah’s Hope, which will contribute $2,500 to any church adoption fund that meets its criteria.